Lets Talk Koalas

Yep these guys

This is completely off topic, as if this blog ever stuck to the topic. Like most households, my dad rules the  television.  We have to ask watch one of our shows, our being my mother and me.  So most of the time we’re left watching what he has decided will be the entertainment for the night. Mainly I will just hightail it to my room to watch what I want. Occasionally though, I like to be social, so I’ll sit and watch whatever is on with the roommates. Last night was koalas.

I guess I’ve never really delved into all things koalas but I  just assumed they were as cute and cuddly as they look.  I guess I should’ve predicted they would be mean little f#*$ers. They do have bear in their name, but I mean they are flat-out nasty! They opened last night show with Mary, who was a slut, and Harry. Well apparently being a female koala entitles you to get humped whenever the male damn well pleases. Sound familiar? Lucky for us it isn’t all “hey baby get over here”, because Mary actually puts up a fight. She’s saving herself for the Buster, alpha koala, hubba hubba. Please find the clip below which demonstrates the noises these little furry, not so nice, creatures produce!

You’re shocked aren’t you, cause so was I! Who would’ve known? The howling/growling type noise you hear at the end is to signal victory.   So they go from being this whinny, little annoying noise, to this fierce, Id be looking for a panther somewhere  in a tree, type noise. The f$%^ is this shit?

Now that we’ve established these creatures are not nice or cuddly we can move on to the way they move. I’m going to go out on limb here and assume most of you have only seen koalas, well, on a limb. ( I totally planned that from the beginning) Sitting in a tree all mellowed out because they sleep 18 hours a day.(?!?) When they do decide to move, it’s hilarious. The documentary showed these guys walking around and I almost peed my pants. See video below

 

HAVE YOU EVER SEEN SOMETHING SO FUNNY!?!? Probably but I crack up every time!  Evolution gave you the short end of the stick koalas. I imagine this is what a frog would look like if it decided to walk instead of hop. I mean it’s just ridiculous. Stick to the tree koalas, stick to the trees.

Thanks for tuning into this week’s Diane Don’t Know Shit About Shit. Tune in next week where we’ll be exploring blind mole rats. We won’t really be, I just had to put something to make it sound cool.

Have a nice weekend y’all.

D

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1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Mom
    May 17, 2012 @ 09:58:43

    GO TEAM JACK!!!!

    Reply

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