Heres Mommy!

Oh my little tiger lilies I’ve neglected you once again. I’m probably the worst kind of blogger there is. That’s not even talking about the grammar portion. I was in hiatus. School was overwhelming me and still is. Not overwhelming, but stressing me the f#$* out. The holiday in the middle of the week jacked me up. I’ve put off so much work at work that I’m now in panic catch up mood. I spent money, a lot more than I should have.  A giant polar bear maliciously attacked me. I made up that part. I figured since I seemed full of excuses that I would try my hand at an imaginary one.  I have this eerie feeling that I’m going to get fired, from both jobs. Maybe it’s my conscience telling me to shape up or maybe it’s my subconscious wishing I could be unemployed. No worries though, the logical part of my brain chimes in real fast. It makes sure to tell me to straighten the f#($ up because you would have collections on your ass so fast, you need your jobs.  I’m thinking more and more about entrepreneurship. I could be my own boss, sleep however late I wanted to, make up my own hours, and pay myself a six figure salary. It’d be awesome. I just gotta find the “entre” or “preneurship” of that idea, which ever is the business definition of that word. I’ve got the person, I just need the business.  Yes, I understand I can’t pay myself six figures without having the business that would allow me to bill six figures. Gosh! Why do you guys have to be such dream crushers! Let a girl dream for a little!

In other news Ted is an awful movie and anyone who said it was “hilarious” should be shot in the foot because that’d be funny then that movie.

Happy Muggle Day, because today I’m a wizard.

D

And Then I Found $20

My brother told me once that when a story has gone off the deep end and you’ve completely lost everyone’s attention to add, “and then I found $20” to the end, and itll bring it back to life. This has proven to work on numerous occasions but most of the time your audience leaves disappointed anyways because you have to explain how you didn’t actually find $20. You can try to save face by explaining the whole history of “and then I found $20” to anyone who might still be around but chances are all hope will be gone.  Everyone will have either concluded you’re a liar, a horrible story-teller or both. If I had the ability to give you back your time here I would, but I chose the power of invisibility when presented with the options, so these minutes will be lost forever. I hope this was as awkward for everyone else as it was for me and then I found $20.

Mondays are evil

D

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